Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts

English speaking mayor of Madrid - What a Joke (Ana Botella)

This week I begin my new term of teaching English and what a way to ease myself in by watching this video of the mayor of Madrid, Spain.When the first few seconds of the video came on I thought it was a joke from a show or something. My hands hit my head in shock, "oh dios mio, no puede ser"

My ears couldn't believe what they were hearing, was this woman really pretending she knew or was fluent in English or did she really think she was capable of doing a speech in English?
Why did her colleagues let her speak out? Did they not think this was going to end in embarrassment not just for Ana Botella herself but also for Spain?
"Madrid is beautiful and Spanish people know how to celebrate" but Ana Botella, you made us look like we have no clue, but I am not going to ridicule this lady as she has had enough from the Spanish press.
I want to offer her the chance to learn English with a native English Teacher,  I'm sure I can charge a lot less than your actual teacher and you will be able to string a sentence together that actually makes sense.
Call me!

Made In Heaven

Saw a friend wearing this when I was putting lotion on his neck.
Maybe I'm not so into fashion as I had thought, Made in Heaven?
AWESOME

 

Ride close ups! Hilarious

Have you ever wondered what your face really looks like close up on a ride?

Our friends took us to a mini amusement park in Safranbolu called Luna Park and suggested the "Condor".
Now, I am not one to be easily scared on rides but I did wonder why one backed down at the last minute. As it was just the 5 of us we decided to sit on each end, BIG MISTAKE. One was screaming for the ride to stop the whole time which at first was funny but when everyone begged the man to stop it did get really scary for me too. Below is the evidence.

In the words of Willhelm "Dimli Dimli, Yok Yok  Yok, Dür, Dür"





The close Ups!!












Buses, Food and Toilet Humour





Yesterday, the girls and I decided we had had enough of staying enclosed in the school premises day after day so we decided to venture out on our own to the closest city, which is Safranbolu. The first funny thing was trying to catch a bus. The buses are tiny and obviuosly being in a small city no one could speak English. It was a moment of Lost in translation. We had no idea where to get off or even how. People would just shout at the bus driver and the driver would stop. Eventually the driver manager to see we were having problems so he sat us down and made the gesture that he would tell us when to get off. Tthe funny thing was that when we saw a part of the city we recognised we stood up so we could get off the bus. The driver wouldn't let us. We were gesturing and nodding "yes yes, we want to get off". At least in the end he managed to let us off. After that we went for a doner with a salad, chips and a coke, and the meal cost us only 5TL (this is equivalent to 2.50€) shocker!!! Really great food. On the way home we saw a pub and decided to be naughty and enter. We were the only women in there and the men were rather shocked but really welcoming towards us. We stayed for a couple of beers and the service was great. We were given travel broshures of the city of places to visit. The owner even took photos of us because of the shock of having three women in his bar. Unfortunately the only bad thing about the bar is that the toilet was awful. I was really dying to go and almost passed out from the smell. Of course it was going to smell. No women ever go in. You even have a picture of Marilyn Monroe on the walls. We were close to asking the owner to do something about it but we refrained ourselves. But below you can see the translation.

We then got a taxi home and the owner accompanied us. He wasn't doing this to try it on or anything like that, it was because he was being a gentlemen towards us. So far I have been so surprised with the way we are being looked after by everyone. People have been very ignorant and said not to trust anyone and I think that is something to be said about anywhere you go. But Turkey is different in a positive aspect. People are welcoming, hospitable, friendly and will go out of their way to make you feel good. I definitely would recommend coming to this country. Not only for its beautiful sites, but the food and the whole place in general.



Getting the Bus was a real adventure.
Welcome to Safranbolu
Doner for 2.50€ woop woop
With the owner of Safran Pub in Safranbolu
Yummy Erick Erick

How to lose your job as a T.V interviewer.

I saw this clip a while back, and the interviewers laugh is so contagious that I was also laughing throughout the whole video.

Reasons why email was invented.

Always wondered why email was really created?

To save trees????

Nope, think again or just have a look....

Birthday wish....

Dear friends,
As there are still a few months until my birthday, I thought I would all give you help on what you can get me. Just all chip in together and I'm sure you will all manage to help me get this wonderful gift.....


LOL It is brilliant isn't it!?

15 things.....

Received this email today and thought each point was really interesting, so here they are....

15 THINGS THAT IT TOOK ME OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN:
By Dave Barry, Nationally Syndicated Columnist

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

5. You should not confuse your career with your life.

6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7. Never lick a steak knife.

8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to a waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14. Your friends love you anyway.

15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.
FINAL THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2030, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

The Guitarist Duo - (Mozart)

I saw this video and thought it was truly amazing. These guys must have practised a lot to get this to sound perfect.

Bra's and knickers...

If you are really untidy with your bedroom drawers here my tip of the day to help keep your Bra and knickers all tiday....

If you have matching underwear or even the same colour....Then just open your bra strap and loop or tie it to your knickers or thong. That way if you are in a rush and need to pick up a pair, you just stick your hand in the drawer and get pair a matching set together without having to faff around looking it.

Ohhh yes please.

Have you ever been told you are too old to sit on Santa's Lap?


Te han dicho alguna vez
que núnca eres demasiado mayor para sentarte en el
regazo de SANTA?

The EU official Language....

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than the other possibility, German.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.
In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped infavour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will bereplaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, vevil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultisand evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer,ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forstplas.

Chistes del día

Ya que las navidades se acercan muchos de ustedes ahora si iran para casita a ver tus familiares. Muchos cogeran un avion de 2 o 3 horas o como yo uno de 11 horas!!!

Acabo de recibir este email para ayudar calmar los nervios y pense en compartirlo con todos.

Un saludo a tod@s y sed felices!

----------------------------------------------------------------
Despega un vuelo. El capitán de la nave les da la bienvenida a los pasajeros, les informa sobre el vuelo y el estado del tiempo y por último se despide deseándoles un muy agradable viaje.
Lamentablemente olvida cerrar el micrófono y le hace un comentario al copiloto:
- Bueeeeeeennooooo... Ahora me fumo un cigarrillo y después, aprovechando que en primera clase no viaja nadie, me voy a echar un polvo con la azafata, de esos que te dejan muerto,...

La azafata, desesperada al ver que todo el pasaje estaba escuchando lo que el capitán decía, se lanza a la carrera para avisar que el micrófono se encontraba abierto, pero en el camino le sale al paso una anciana que le dice:
- ¿ A dónde va la calentorraa ?....... ¿ No escuchaste que primero se va a fumar un cigarrillo ?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Están todos los pasajeros en la sala de embarque esperando la salida del vuelo.
De repente llega el copiloto impecablemente uniformado con gafas oscuras y un bastón blanco tanteando el camino. La empleada de la compañía aclara que, si bien es ciego, es el mejor copiloto que tiene la Empresa.
Al poco rato llega el piloto, con el uniforme impecable, gafas oscuras y un bastón blanco asistido por dos azafatas. La encargada de la sala aclara que también el piloto es ciego, pero que es el mejor piloto que tiene la Compañía y que, junto con el copiloto, hacen la dupla más experimentada.
Con todos a bordo, el avión comienza a correr por la pista tomando cada vez más velocidad y con los pasajeros aterrorizados. El avión sigue tomando velocidad pero no despega; continúa la carrera y sigue en tierra.
El final de la pista está cada vez más cerca y en una explosión de histeria general los pasajeros comienzan a gritar como poseídos. En ese momento el avión milagrosamente toma altura. Entonces el piloto le dice al copiloto:
- ¡ El día que los pasajeros no griten............. no la contamos!!!!

Nuevas Monedas!


¡¡¡OJO!!!

Está circulando una moneda falsa de 2 EUR, te adjunto la foto para que lo tengas en cuenta.